Need some guy advice . . .

So the guy that I've been seeing off and on, at his convenience, went off on me for letting someone drive my car to the carwash while I was sick. He ignores me for weeks, I dont see him, he's cheated on me, and now because I let a guy drive my car, he's "done" with me! He keeps texting and "private call" bugging me. Extremely jealous and crazy! I loved him so much it hurts, and I've waited on him to commit forever. Now he tells me he was thinking about it for the last few months, wanted to get a house together, but NO, now it's too late. And I can't be trusted.

I've never hurt him or done anything remotely bad to him, yet I'm the worse person on earth for letting some dude drive my car.

Psycho? Still loves me? RUN LIKE HELL?

Please vote the appropriate response . . .

There's to many nice ones out there--Cut Him Loose,you deserve better.Oh, he fits 2 out of three.

Walk away. Period. The guy is obviously not secure in himself. You can not bring someone in your life if you're not comfortable with yourself. Jealously is an bad thing. Very bad. There's a lot to be said about being self confident.

There's some obviously deep seeded reasons for his actions, and you should feel lucky that you found out now rather than later. It could not only be a giant PITA, but also dangerous.

Did you want me to talk to Jared?! JK!

And we will have a talk with young Jared and have him stop pestering you. lol

Run away and don't look back. Buy some toys and lube and go that route.

Ahhh, i knew I could count on my BMMC brothers, hard to be strong enough to let go sometimes. Loved him for so long, but this would just get worse, if we were together. Imagine me trying to go to the store . . . geez.

Now I just need to be tough when he calls or texts. I've gotten 6 private calls this morning alone.

Tell him you bought new c battery's and you don't need him anymore.

The good ones use D cell's

I am not proud of my past but It takes a dog to recognize a
dog so I will enlighten you. (I’m reformed) He is a game player and is breaking
you down. He reels you and then allows you to swim back out, you will
eventually roll over. Starting a fight is like setting an emotional boundary.
Example, are you going to allow someone to ever borrow your car again? Boundary set.

Stages are as follows

The good times ( Your love developed here)


Jealousy seems cute


Boundaries being set
(could take a while)


Testing your willingness (standing you up, breaking up, cheating, humiliation
tactics, extreme signs of dedication)


Commitment/Marriage (abuse and more of the above)


Just something to think about, could be completely wrong

All of the above scenario is true, reels me in then pushes me away. Leaves me for someone else, keeping me on the side, making me a mistress for half of our time together. Then he dumps her, but didn't come back to me, kept me in my place. And now that I'm telling him, let it be done, now he wants to talk about how he wanted a commitment, etc.

Playing games with my little doggie head . . . I'll get over the hurt, and I'll eventually not miss him, or love him. I've been alone, without him off and on so much, it'll be easier than I thought. Seeing ur alleged mate once a month is not enough, when they have time to see everyone else in the world but you. And sadly, he'd use sex to keep me in line. Withhold it to punish me, or make me do things for his enjoyment. And I did it, cause I wanted him to be happy, and I was afraid he'd leave me. What a pathetic loser I had become . . .

I forgot to mention, he's very young . . . But I will never speak ill of him or run him down to anyone else. I made the choice to stay with him and try to please him. I don't think he's a bad person, just not a person that I can deal with anymore. I'm not a slave or an object to possess, and I hate rules or being told what to do, can't believe I let him control me for so long . . . live and learn.

I basically agree with everyone else here, so I will add little but my vote.

He's a psycho, run like hell.

You're obviously too good a person to put up with shit like that. Hold your head up and move on to new happy hunting grounds!

probkauz wrote:All of the above scenario is true, reels me in then pushes me away. Leaves me for someone else, keeping me on the side, making me a mistress for half of our time together. Then he dumps her, but didn't come back to me, kept me in my place. And now that I'm telling him, let it be done, now he wants to talk about how he wanted a commitment, etc.

Playing games with my little doggie head . . . I'll get over the hurt, and I'll eventually not miss him, or love him. I've been alone, without him off and on so much, it'll be easier than I thought. Seeing ur alleged mate once a month is not enough, when they have time to see everyone else in the world but you. And sadly, he'd use sex to keep me in line. Withhold it to punish me, or make me do things for his enjoyment. And I did it, cause I wanted him to be happy, and I was afraid he'd leave me. What a pathetic loser I had become . . .

I forgot to mention, he's very young . . . But I will never speak ill of him or run him down to anyone else. I made the choice to stay with him and try to please him. I don't think he's a bad person, just not a person that I can deal with anymore. I'm not a slave or an object to possess, and I hate rules or being told what to do, can't believe I let him control me for so long . . . live and learn.

NEVER let a male use sex as leverage you can give it away faster than a man can buy it

I already feel kind of relieved. I'm not sitting around waiting for him to call, or worrying if I'm gonna get in trouble for something. That I may "displease" him in some way, and then suffer the cold shoulder.

Thanks my BMMC brothers . . . just needed a little confidence boost.

.[/quote]NEVER let a male use sex as leverage you can give it away faster than a man can buy it[/quote]

Kelly! Shhhhh! If women find out our secret tactics, we're all doomed! I'll need your Man Card please... ;)

I hate drama. The dude is messing with you. leave him, forget him and don't look back. I have a few friends I speak to and hate to see them get hurt. If he's going to play around, you don't need his games.

If I'm with a woman, I'm up front with her. No strings attach or something serious. I try to be professional and mature about it. I don't like games myself and I don't need any drama.

Hang in there Sandy, I was afraid my post was to direct but you took it in stride. You said he was young and that makes complete sense. Do yourself a favor and dont answer your phone after 10pm.

2006GT wrote:.

NEVER let a male use sex as leverage you can give it away faster than a man can buy it[/quote]

Kelly! Shhhhh! If women find out our secret tactics, we're all doomed! I'll need your Man Card please... ;)[/quote]lmao

Sandy, IMO...he is making excuses not to be with you but he doesn't want anyone else to have you either so he is stringing you along. You deserve MUCH better than that!!! Good luck girl!

SaleenStang wrote:Sandy, IMO...he is making excuses not to be with you but he doesn't want anyone else to have you either so he is stringing you along. You deserve MUCH better than that!!! Good luck girl!

X2

And it just gets better . . . still have the blood infection from the spider bite . . and drum roll . . . . found a "lump" Tuesday. Not my first rodeo with the big "C" either. I am sooooo tired right now, need a little vacation in the hospital I'm thinking.

when it rains it pours.hopefully it wont be serious

Man I hate to hear that! I lost my mother to breast cancer. Actually, it was poor doctors and chemo. Get yourself someone who knows what they are doing and take care of it now. Not later. Let me know if you need anything!

I already had ovarian/uteran cancer 6 years ago. Nice :) I'm going tomorrow to the dr., and then may drive to Tulsa to see my gnomies, Jared and the awesome E! Plan on attending the shindig on the 23rd(?) too. So be ready bishes, I'm coming to Tulsa!

P.S. He texted this morning being nice, then started bitching then when he thought i wanted to work it out, told me he was done again. Told him to F#%$^ OFF, and never text or call me again, it's over!!! I am WOMAN, hear me ROAR!!!!

Bravo!

probkauz wrote:P.S. He texted this morning being nice, then started bitching then when he thought i wanted to work it out, told me he was done again. Told him to F#%$^ OFF, and never text or call me again, it's over!!! I am WOMAN, hear me ROAR!!!!

Wow Sandy I hope everything turns out alright. Get it checked out ASAP!

As far as the guy... The thing to do is cut him out completely. There is no "gradual" when it comes to things like this. There's no need drag it out. Sounds like you're on the right path.

Sandy just know that we love and support you!! If you need something do not hesitate to count on us.

Ditto!

BTW... if we were on the Oprah show, this is where everyone would cry.

Que the tissues for the issues! ;)

Group hug!!!! LOL